COURT JESTERINGS

With h brown

Photo(s) by Luke Thomas

Court Jester writes open letter to Danny Glover

By h. brown

March 28, 2007

Dear Danny,

It's time you came home and did some heavy lifting. You are the only potential Progressive candidate who can beat Gavin Newsom this November and God knows, the poor, people of color and artists need a mayor who will stop the cattle drive forcing us out of town. Let me list a few reasons you should run.

Newsom is giving SF to the rich

As did Willie. While not new, the pace has quickened under Gavin. The stables in the park, the golf courses, the marinas, the soccer fields, … all have been recommended for privatization by Mayor Newsom.

Treasure Island, as a reclaimed military base was supposed to be used first to alleviate the problem of homelessness. The development package in place is headed by the Mayor's chief fundraiser and there is no place there for the poor. Same thing with Candlestick Point. Same thing with Hunters Point. All with the same developer (Lennar).

The cops are out of control

The senior staff is comprised of thugs who recruit red necks in the suburbs as cadets. The chief is afraid of her own shadow. Gavin vetoed legislation forcing the police to walk beats. We are the only major city without a single police helicopter. The cops mothballed their kiosks years ago and stopped riding the buses regularly at about the same time.

Arrests are down 20% and Gary Delagnes, the head of the POA (Police Officers Association) laughed on the Art Bruzzone show that this was because they didn't think they could get convictions. Rather than be arrested, junkies and street criminals are herded into 'containment zones' in neighborhoods like the Tenderloin where I live.

Steroid use is rampant on the force and easily 80% of the brutality claims are against bulked-up monsters with no controls at any point in the chain of command. Police are the only emergency service not subjected to random drug tests.

Public Safety, overall, is a joke. The fire chief lives almost in Daly City instead of the house built for our chief in the center of town. She suggested we use the chief's residence as a bed and breakfast. She has divided the department by emergency medical and fire service divisions in complete opposition to the national trend of combining the two.

The OES (Office of Emergency Services) was run by a complete political hack until the entire community forced her out. The infiltration into the department by Homeland Security has resulted in such insane dictates as … no marking the location of fresh water cisterns (there are over 500 of them) where citizens can get a drink after the water mains break.

You'll control the Redevelopment Agency

In an honest world, Redevelopment would be called: 'The Department of Negro Removal'. And, they've done a bang-up job and continue to do so. As I type this, they are planning the privatization of the City's last public housing projects. Guess how many displaced tenants will be allowed to return?

You'll control 61 of 63 department heads

Only the Department of Ethics and the Department of Elections are not controlled directly by the Mayor or his Downtown buddies. Imagine being able to hire literally thousands of people. Give them a job for life with decent benefits.

You'll control 15 billion dollars in contracts

Around 6 billion in the regular budget and another 9 or 10 in bond revenue that keeps growing and growing. You can give black and brown people billions to rebuild Hetch-Hetchy and start construction of a high-speed rail line to L.A.

You'll control art funding

The 'Swells' decide what is art in San Francisco. While your tiny Vanguard charity has done admirable work, it is a drop in the bucket. Most public funding goes to pet projects of billionaires and their lap dogs.

We need you

God knows you've done lots already. God knows you're the real deal. But, you ain't that rich and you can leverage your fame into Room 200 at City Hall where you can take 8 years spending between 50 and 100 billion dollars with an eye toward justice and opportunity and compassion.

No one else in town can beat Newsom's Downtown juggernaut. You can beat him easily. Please consider this plea and realize that I am far from alone. In the alternative media of political wonks, you are the man.

Please consider the idea and let us help. Matt Gonzalez (I was his 'Minister of Propaganda' in the last campaign) says you'd make a great candidate and he'd gladly support you. So does Ross Mirkarimi. So does Chris Daly. So does Krissy Keefer. So does Marc Salomon. And, so do I.

If you're interested, come talk to us. We meet for beer and burritos every Friday at a little taqueria on Howard street (1550 between 11th & 12th from 1pm til 3pm). We're an army without a leader. Let it be you.

Thanks,

h. brown

h. brown is a 62 year-old keeper of sfbulldog.com, an eclectic site featuring a half dozen City Hall denizens. h is a former sailor, firefighter, teacher, nightclub owner, and a hard-living satirical muckraker. Email h at h@ludd.net.

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