Hillary won New Hampshire?

Not so fast, lady...

By Terry Canaan, special to Fog City Journal

January 10, 2007

Hillary Clinton won the Democratic primary in New Hampshire Tuesday. Well, the popular vote anyway. But when you look at the numbers that -- oh, what's the word -- count... Well, not so much.

New Hampshire's not a winner-take-all primary and delegates to the national convention are divvied proportionately. When the smoke cleared, Clinton had 9 delegates, Obama had 9, and Edwards scored 4. For all intents and purposes, New Hampshire was a tie.

Still, you know what they say, "Tying is better than losing." They also say it's like kissing your sister. (AP, via reddit)

Headline of the day

"2 bring corpse to store to cash check." David J. Dalaia and James O'Hare used an office chair to roll Virgilio Cintron's body to a NYC Pay-O-Matic -- a check cashing store -- in order to cash his Social Security check. According to the report, a witness "saw the two pushing the chair with Cintron flopping from side to side and the two individuals propping him up and keeping him from flopping from side to side." Unpleasant...

Anyhoo, they got to the store, parked the body outside, and went in to cash the $355 check. "The store's clerk, who knew Cintron, asked the men where he was," the report reads, "And O'Hare told the clerk they would go and get him." Yeah, they were going to roll the dead guy in and pretend he was alive or something. It wasn't the world's most cunning plan. Apparently they'd seen Weekend at Bernie's once, which is one too many times.

Meanwhile, a police detective having lunch next door noticed a crowd gathering around the Pay-O-Matic and investigated, reporting that it was "immediately apparent" that Cintron had expired. More cops and EMT's were just arriving when O'Hare and Dalaia came out to wheel the stiff in for whatever the hell they had in mind. Both were arrested and charged with check fraud.

It's a good thing that the cops showed up when they did or the HotD might've been, "2 put on world's most nightmarish puppet show." (AP)

Update on the Alan Keyes machine

Stephen Stone, CEO of Alan Keyes for President, blasted the RNC and the Iowa GOP for keeping Keyes out of the Iowa caucuses. Stone said the party was "motivated by bias against him -- in a way that is un-American and contrary to democratic principles... In our judgment, the tactics we've witnessed by the state party are reminiscent of 'communist-style' electoral politics."

Yeah, that's what I thought -- first time anyone's ever accused the Republican party of being commie. In an article at ChristianNewsWire.com, Stone spells out his charges, which include, "The Iowa GOP continues to exclude Keyes as a candidate on their website -- as well as exclude his vote totals -- as though his candidacy doesn't exist."

It kind of doesn't exist. Do I need to remind anyone that the "Draft Alan Keyes" campaign was initiated by -- *ahem*, well -- Alan Keyes? Awkward...

If he got any delegates at all, I'd be surprised. Maybe they aren't listing his vote totals because there aren't any vote totals. There weren't any votes.

Seriously, the only purpose Alan Keyes serves is to make sure Duncan Hunter doesn't score dead last. (ChristianNewsWire.com, via Right Wing Watch)

Terry Canaan is a former political fundraiser living and writing in Wisconsin. He publishes the blog "Griper Blade."

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